Confused about my bicuriosity

May I say, you are you. Forget the labels. Do what you are comfortable doing and enjoy. Every once in a while a situation comes along that allows us to stretch our ideas just a bit.

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Ok, here is my dilemma... I haven't thought myself as a bisexual guy, but in the last swinger encounter that i had with a couple, had some experience that left me confused...While the husband was doing her, she was blowing me, but in a moment the movements were changing drastically, the suction was stronger, and then i realized they were taking turns sucking it!!!It wasn't feeling bad, so i let it happen... I didn't minded.He didn't tried to do anything else, and it was good, cause i was ready to stop him...Next day, while i was thinking about it, i thought that i do not like men, but i would mind, while in a couple, that the husband will suck my dick.... But i am not attracted to kiss, suck his dick or do him in the ass....I am not homophobic at all, it's just not my taste...In another order of ideas, i love a woman to play with my ass, give me a rimjob, and even stick a finger, but again, not interested in having that done by a manSo... My dilemma is... What am i? Bi, bicurious or just really sexual

You have no dilemma. What you think is right for you is what is right for you. Just because a man sucked your dick and you liked it doesn't mean anything other than your penis responds to BJ's. Most men like BJ's from anyone. Now, to address the other part. Being gay, being bi, having sex with other men is not bad. It's not wrong. And I appreciate that you don't feel homophobic and likely aren't rude to gay people, but...you are being homophobic to yourself in calling this a "dilemma" and being stressed about it (we call this internalized homophobia and we all have it, gay straight otherwise) our culture makes sure we get it on a visceral level very young.

It's clear you are uncomfortable with the boundaries moving so quickly. I would also evaluate the need to list all the things you won't do with another man. It's not necessary to convince us, we believe you. Is it to convince yourself? I'm not asking to be mean, but to get you thinking about it. Before this, you would have said you wouldn't let a man suck your dick or that if he did, you wouldn't enjoy it. Clearly, that assumption was wrong. But that still doesn't mean you're gay or bi or losing your straight identity or love of women. And if it did, that is a process many have gone through and many still, you'f be in good company.

So once again, I'd suggest rather than making a new list of stuff you won't do with a man you rather ask yourself this: did I enjoy that experience? What about it did I like? Was there anything I disliked? What was is? Is this an experience I want to avoid for the rest of my life, or am I comfortable in repeating it? If I am comfortable, is this the best way for me to learn and grow from it? Sexual curiosity about all kinds of stuff is normal. So is being unsure, and so is exploring and taking your time. One last thing. If you like a man sucking your dick, you like the man, just a little bit. Also, it's OK for straight men to feel affection, love and even have sex with other men. It's whether you identify with those things as being the core of who you are with no other possible that makes one gay.

Our culture once again teaches us that any form of affection or intimacy between men is wrong and evil. It isn't. But we also don't need to assert that we have no attraction to other men. That's a lonely place to be...no fatherly love, no brotherly love, and no bonds of friendship. All of which are very little different no matter your orientation.

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