Advice/Experienced Opinions
Hello All!
I was hoping for some advice on how to arrange rules with you partner on the topic of swinging/involving others in your sex life.
While my SO and I have had group experiences, we have traditionally only been involved with other men. After a conversation turned to fantasizing about other women/couples, my SO went online and posted and ad the following day for a female/couple, without my knowledge. He also forwarded a couple and a single female response to this ad to our joint email account for me to view.
Upon seeing this, we had a conversation in which I expressed I was still uncomfortable with the reality of moving immediately into that frontier. We agreed to step back, fantasize and talk more, and allow me time to get more comfortable with approaching this in reality.
Today, the next day, I open our joint email to see another female ad he's forwarded me after going back on CL and looking for women/couple ads. I was immediately uncomfortable and hurt to see that he'd done this a day after I felt we'd had a clear conversation that we wouldn't progress. He says it's not progression, just shopping -- but my take is that it's a step, in reality, that we agreed we wouldn't take out of fantasy land.
Takes/advice/suggestions on appropriate expectations and reactions, not only in this instance but in the future? I feel like clear comfort zones were drawn, but crossed -- how do we increase understanding about the best operating procedures? Is there literature out there that may help?
All time and responses are very much appreciated.
Thank you!
I can only give a man's perspective here, but seeming that you have already gone the group route, or done a little with other men, you probably have him so excited about introducing another woman that he made the original post for another woman on the web, this site or where ever. The responses are just coming from the first ad I am sure. Him still looking after you said it, is like shopping for him.
Ron White, Blue Collar Comedy Club, once said, once a man sees a pair of TITS, he wants to see the rest of them.
Although he didn't follow through with going slower in the inviting another woman department, you probably have him so worked up about the idea, that he can not contain himself.
Do not know if this helps much. PM me for any other insight I may be able to give. Phil1985
Sincerely, Phil.