RESPECT AND COURTESY
RESPECT AND ONLINE COURTESY
Another aspect of "Respect" is simple social graces-specifically Courtesy. If you tell someone you are going to visit them, one would assume that person is planning their day around your visit. Most likely they are putting some chores or activities on hold, pending your promised visit. Why are so many people, young and old, saying they are going to do something or come for a visit, then never show up? They never phone or send an email message to say they are not going to make it. My only thought is that since they communicated by the internet, they feel exempt from common courtesy.
Great topic, we are a very respectful and inclusive couple. I am a 24 year retired Veteran my wife is a Doctor. But for the past two days we have been removed from chat rooms with no explanation. We have ask why with no response and questions to the matter on the forum have simply been deleted with no consideration of a reply. Polite emails to the admin who removed us received no response.
This is hurtful and unwelcoming particularly in a meeting place such as this where respect for orientation and inclusivity is so important.
We were excited to find this site but that excitement has been tarnished. Hoping to see that turned around and be shown some respect and consideration through positive leadership from site administrators.
Please feel free to reach out us, if we did something inappropriate we are unaware.
Respectfully,
BareBunz
RESPECT AND ONLINE COURTESYAnother aspect of "Respect" is simple social graces-specifically Courtesy. If you tell someone you are going to visit them, one would assume that person is planning their day around your visit. Most likely they are putting some chores or activities on hold, pending your promised visit. Why are so many people, young and old, saying they are going to do something or come for a visit, then never show up? They never phone or send an email message to say they are not going to make it. My only thought is that since they communicated by the internet, they feel exempt from common courtesy.
This extends into all spaces. People think that it is fine to change their mind on all manner of relational decisions (ones that involve more than the self) because we have systems that make it fast to do so, and they also allow anonymizing and delay of response. The better offer, the pang of fear, the lack of will, the general inability to follow through, the belief that we're entitled or better or simply just that fabulous. None of this is true it is all avoidance and it is all based in the fear that we will not measure up or be able to reciprocate or that we must. Take each decision with care, have the best intention to follow through and make the steps needed to follow through. At the first sign of not being able to when you made the effort, cancel graciously and ask for a raincheck, send a card or even a gift, especially for a very elaborate sex event. If you ghost don't ask again that is rude. Call if you're more than ten late, and if you're more than twenty early. Don't promise more than being present and willing. Be the one who said they are doing it, not with guest or others in tow. Offer to host in return. Leave only if the situation demands it, and don't go for your own needs only and ignore the host. Practice politness in all things it is a great way to make life better.,
Thanks for the post GrayFox I am mindful of my own shortcomings at times.
Great topic, we are a very respectful and inclusive couple. I am a 24 year retired Veteran my wife is a Doctor. But for the past two days we have been removed from chat rooms with no explanation. We have ask why with no response and questions to the matter on the forum have simply been deleted with no consideration of a reply. Polite emails to the admin who removed us received no response.This is hurtful and unwelcoming particularly in a meeting place such as this where respect for orientation and inclusivity is so important.We were excited to find this site but that excitement has been tarnished. Hoping to see that turned around and be shown some respect and consideration through positive leadership from site administrators.Please feel free to reach out us, if we did something inappropriate we are unaware.Respectfully,BareBunz
It was in my opinion since I have not seen this happen much here at all because you inadvertently or otherwise posted a topic thematic or subject that is banned by the site. There are some habitual phrases in use that get insta banned as they allude to illegal acts. If you hit on one by accident that will do it. I can't speak for the moderators nor the rest and wouldn't think to. They are also human.
I agree 100% about the gay men. Some just won't quit.
I mean, I agree with you and am well brought up not to bark up the wrong tree but I have to chuckle just a bit because now both of you know what it's like for most women on this site. Not that it is right either way and I hope your experience is better from here on out.
How about HERE on site? Gay Men,,,,YOU need to READ a profile and RESPECT the wishes of a straight man who posts up and has a profile. I clearly state my preference to be straight and state I am NOT interested in men, including gay men. Yet i have to deal with unwanted comments and TOO many men asking to 'friend' here. I used to just deny.,,but to get the point across better, now I call them out and message them to GET WITH IT, read and respect a profile choice, and then I block them for good. I must have waay over 50 men on my block list by now. Often a couple a day. What's wrong with this? Its'unfair. They should not be so pushy towards straight men, no matter how they may have some sexual feelings for his pics. Respect my profile and anybody else who does NOT wish to hear from or be sought after by gay men. Hope the forum gets much more follow ups than my own profile info does.MY definition of a 'swinger' is the choice of a man to join a couple to share his wife, or a couple swap of women, or all the women who wish to entertain me, It does not include cock docking or anything entering my ass! Got it? MY choice. ,,,Respect the profiles.
This could have been written: I don't appreciate when men don't read my profile, it is rude. Or even gay men. I don't enjoy 8 driveby likes and no message or some cryptic two word ask either. No one does I think. So I don't send them. But the lament you produced isn't going to stop the ones doing it, in fact, you have probably emboldened some. It's a bit over the top, i assumed you don't get into docking from the first 20 lines and the profile which I read. There's not much courtesy in the reply which may be understandable, but not particularly effective. I will continue to not message you. Gay as I may be, was not raised in a barn. You might also try a different comms strategy. Be firm, be fair, and explain to them it;s embarrassing for them as men to not read profiles and you're sorry they don't understand that. Because the borderline homophobia (defended you on this on another thread today) is going to piss them off. It wont solve your problem. It's also important to separate someone saying hi from a sexual advance. It's ok to say hi to a gay dude and follow up with not looking for male friends thanks. I do that for some women all the time. Polite, and direct. If they are lewd, again, iits not right and you shouldn't have to deal with it. Or you could make a few gay friends here platonically who might support you and help you. Or not. I wasnt offering personally, we're not all the same as str8 men aren't either. Good luck.
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