New to Swinging

I am new to swinger and like to just talk with a lifetime swinger or at least someone who has been in the lifestyle for a long time. I need advice. Please help!
I've been with my boyfriend for three years now. He only recently regained his urge to have sex. His ex had hurt him real bad that he shut himself down emotionally. Since being with me, he has reawakened. We were fine at first, but his swinger side has awakened too. Now, I am not doing enough for him. I have told him that I am not comfortable with the idea of three-some encounters or group encounters. So, I comprised. We started doing voyeur chat. I new right away that it wasn't enough. He's talking about taking me to a swinger club. I prefer the anonymity of the voyeur chat. I know if I ease into things it'll be easier to expand upon my comfort level and maybe do more of what he likes and enjoy it myself. But, I can't help feeling rushed.
I guess what I want to know is what else is there in between the voyeur chat and actual physical group play. I want to take baby steps.
I must admit to the fact that I am an insecure woman. I recognize what makes me insecure and do my best not to let it hold me back. Part of it is feeling comfortable with how I look and loving myself. But, I am no good to his urges if I withdrawal from our relationship. I am working on it and it is slow going. I feel that if we have regular dates of just focusing on us, then the rest of our experiences will move naturally.

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