Opinion please
So my wife and I got into the lifestyle a little more than a year ago. We agreed to some rules before we started out and some rules have changed as we have progressed. Both of us agreed it was to spice up our sex life and explore our fantasies. It has been a lot of fun over the last year.
One of our rules is we always play together. At the time neither of us felt comfortable doing anything with out the other one present.
A few months ago we met another married couple who have been in the lifestyle a long time. Great people and we hit it off. She is not really my type. But we have played on occasion. My wife really liked the husband and we have had threesomes with him pretty regular. To the point my wife asked about doing things alone with him. Here is where my problem arises. I am still very strongly against us playing separate. Even tho I like this guy and trust him I just feel it's a step past where I'm comfortable. She accepted my feelings and agreed not to pursue a one on one with him.
Recently I found out she has been talking to him about doing one on one with him and has suggested to him he talk to me. She has also suggested to him they go on a trip alone which I am completely against To add more to it she is talking to him about just spending time with him cuddling or sleeping in the same bed. Nothing sexual just intimate time. Which is something else that bothers me. I thought this was about Alex and I'm worried it has turned into something much more for her. She creates situations to go see him and just spend time with him. I feel that their friendship and the swinging has turned into more.
My question is how do I approach this conversation. I know I need to explain my concerns.